The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian

Wall-E

Updated: July 1, 2008
I still haven't seen Wall-E, but I'm going this Sunday. Apparently, there's quite the uproar in America over the film. Here's a quote of the evidence from Think Progress:

Shannen Coffin: From the first moment of the film, my kids were bombarded with leftist propaganda about the evils of mankind. It’s a shame, too, because the robot had promise. The story was just awful, however.
Greg Pollowitz: It was like a 90-minute lecture on the dangers of over consumption, big corporations, and the destruction of the environment. … Much to Disney’s chagrin, I will do my part to avoid future environmental armageddon by boycotting any and all WALL-E merchandise and I hope others join my crusade.
Glenn Beck: I can’t wait to teach my kids how we’ve destroyed the Earth. … Pixar is teaching. I can’t wait. You know if your kid has ever come home and said, “Dad, how come we use so much styrofoam,” oh, this is the movie for you.
Dirty Harry: Have we lost Pixar? Have we lost the wonderful studio who brought us The Incredibles and Ratatouille to Bush Derangement Syndrome? Here you have a winning streak going back ten-years, enormous amounts of public goodwill, equal amounts of credibility as serious storytellers, and they stop things cold, yanking you out of the story with the liberal nonsense. Quite a disappointment.
Jonah Goldberg: I agree with the charges of hypocrisy. I agree that the Malthusian fear mongering was annoying

Updated: July 9, 2008
Check out a Time Online article that suggests Wall-E could be the animated film that wins Best Picture Oscar.

Updated: July 14, 2008
Check out a summary of the shit-for-brains controversy over Wall-E.

Hellboy II: The Golden Army

This is looking cool!

Updated: July 19, 2008
I finally saw it with the gang from work on Friday. Visually, it was a very beautiful movie. The story, while it had depth and potential, wasn't really explored. It was Hollywood-pap ... entertaining, without requiring much from the viewer.

Windwalker Movie Trailer

A splendid adventure for family viewing, Windwalker has the distinction of being named the #1 anthropological film of all time in an early 1990s poll of the American Anthropological Association. It's not particularly distinguished in terms of its filmmaking, but this authentic Native American tale is told with exciting vitality and careful attention to details of culture, language, costuming, and age-old traditions. The title character (convincingly played by British actor Trevor Howard) is an aged and dying Cheyenne warrior who, as a young husband and father (played by James Remar in flashbacks), watched helplessly as his wife was killed and one twin son kidnapped by Crow invaders. On his deathbed, he is spiritually revived to solve the mystery of his missing son, and in doing so sets his "windwalker" path to a peaceful afterlife. Featuring an abundance of natural beauty in the mountains of Utah and utilizing sparse, subtitled dialogue spoken in authentic Cheyenne and Crow languages, the film may be too intense for very young viewers (with scenes of PG-rated violence involving enemy warriors, wolves and a bear), but it's essential viewing for anyone interested in Native American cultural history. Independently distributed in 1980 by the Christian family-film company Pacific International Enterprises (whose wholesome founder, Arthur R. Dubs, is profiled in a vintage promo reel included on this DVD), Windwalker was a decade ahead of Dances with Wolves in bringing real, vibrant Indian folklore to a mainstream audience, earning a respectable $18 million at the box office.

Wrost Movie Fight Scene!

Worst Movie Scenes Ever!

Pirates of the Caribbean 3 - At World's End Trailer

Shrek 3 Trailer

The Lookout Trailer

(Scott Frank, USA 2007) “A guy with brain damage, his blind roommate and a bank ripe for robbery. Doesn't sound like much. But wait till you see the spellbinding work that Scott Frank makes of it. If you don't know Frank, he's the screenwriter who crafted two of the best-ever adaptations of Elmore Leonard novels, Out of Sight and Get Shorty. Now, in a knockout directing debut, Frank cooks up his own mischief. The web he spins will pull you in. Guaranteed. Jeff Daniels as the blind man with a sharp wit that doesn't allow for coddling and near matching his triumph in The Squid and the Whale, is exceptional. Joseph Gordon-Levitt, so good in Mysterious Skin and Brick, digs deep into a character who can't even know himself. This is acting of the highest order, putting Gordon-Levitt, 26, up there with the best of his generation.”--Peter Travers, Rolling Stone. With Matthew Goode, Isla Fisher. 99 min.

Rush Hour 3: Trailer

God Grew Tired of Us Trailer

(Christopher Dylan Quinn, USA 2006) God Grew Tired of Us, like many documentaries, is a study of the resilience of human nature and our ability to overcome enormous obstacles in the face of adversity. Specifically, that resilience is showcased through the story of three of Sudan's "Lost Boys," and their struggles to escape Sudan and build a new life in America. The film opens with vivid visuals of the Sudanese civil war, which began in the mid 1980s and has left millions dead. Twenty-five thousand pre-teen male orphans created by the atrocities, The Lost Boys as they came to be known, were forced to flee their homes and trek barefoot across the desert in search of safety. They fled to Ethiopia at first and were allowed to stay until government turmoil there forced them out. They set off to Kenya, where many are still located today. A select few, among them John Bul Dau, Panther Bior, and Daniel Pach,, were allowed to settle in the United States.God Grew Tired of Us, which is lent plenty of glossy star power by narrator Nicole Kidman and executive producer Brad Pitt, follows these three of the less than 4000 Lost Boys who made it to America as they adjust to western culture. If nothing else, this doc, which one the Grand Jury Prize and Audience Award at last year's Sundance Film Festival, feels like a story that needs to be told; an engine to possibly drive change in the Sudan. At the very least, it's a powerful film.”—Joey Chase, Premiere. 89 min. (G)

Revolver

Revolver is a Guy Ritchie movie in the same vein as his other crime movies, Snatch and Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels. Like those, characters and a convoluted story make Revolver a pleasure to watch -- getting you hooked early on, and stringing you along for the ride. Unlike Snatch and Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, however, Revolver is less violent, more complex and has been accused of being pretentious -- which in my opinion, is critique from the small-minded.

Revolver follows Jake Green (Jason Statham), as he is released from prison, where he served seven years in a requested solitary confinement, sandwiched between cells occupied by two conmen. The men communicated on the topics of confidence tricks and chess moves, by writing cryptic notes to each other in books passed between the cells. Green picks on those tricks, and spends five of his years in solitary confinement, being schooled by his neighbours on the strategy to win every game, dubbed "the Formula." Green's two neighbours, meanwhile, learn everything about him, and when they leave prison, they move in on Green's life on the outside, and clean him out of what little wealth he had acquired. Green discovers this two years after he leaves prison, but takes everything in stride, as he leverages "the Formula" to make riches by gambling.

Green eventually goes after casino crime boss, Dorothy Macha (Ray Liotta), who was the cause of Green ending up in prison. The stakes in the game he plays with Macha however, quickly grows, as Macha calls a hit on Green. With his life at stake, Green is given no choice, but to take the protection offer of Zach (Vincent Pastore) and Avi (André Benjamin) -- who ask in return, nothing more than Green's total obedience and all his money. It is in this relationship, that Green discovers the game that is much larger than himself -- and eventually learns to not only to overcome the enemy within himself, but in so doing, learn how to truly win. This is where the story becomes quite esoteric -- almost spiritual.

The story will be confusing, and trying to piece it together on a single viewing may be asking too much. That being said, there is quite a lot invested in characters of the film to make it an easy film on the brain. It is entertaining because of the characters, not just the deep story -- and there really are some wacky characters in the film. You could almost tell another story with some of them. The cinematography is also easy on the eye -- if you've seen Ritchie's previous films, you know he's a competent director. Somewhere in them middle of the movie, he injects some stylized animation for a little trip. It's weird, but it works. It's a great movie, and if you enjoyed Ritchie's previous films, you'll probably dig this one.

Pathfinder Movie

Pathfinder is an action movie with little historic accuracy.  Those looking for such relevancy in a movie that promises the Vikings meeting with American natives before the arrival of Columbus, will be sorely disappointed.  And while you're at it -- check your brain at the door.  This movie is not about stimulating the cerebral cortex -- it's about gratifying base needs for entertainment.  Yet again, Hollywood delivers mind-numbing fodder for simple-minded audiences.

The movie starts with a Viking landing that leaves behind a young boy that grows up as, Ghost, played by Karl Urban, a member of a native tribe.  The grown Viking boy has to face his destiny when 15-years later, another Viking ship lands and the marauding Vikings, called dragon men, kill everyone in his village.  He's left to seek vengeance and prevent the Vikings from slaughtering the next village, where his love interest, Starfire, played by Moon Bloodgood, lives.  That is the plot.  What follows is a lot of grunting; dialogue stolen from other movies of this ilk; a lot of running; sword play; bad acting; and natives speaking perfect English.  Total rubbish.

The Vikings are portrayed as armed brutes that arrive with armies on North American shores to rape, pillage and murder -- in any order.  They're armored, heavily bearded, grunt a lot and hit things.  The native Americans are peaceful by comparison, and can hardly withstand the slaughter that comes with the Vikings.  The elders speak in vague, cryptic messages, aiming to deliver wisdom, but mostly just sounding silly.

The only thing redeemable about this film was the cinematography.  The wide angle landscape shots of snowy mountains, swamps and geography is stunning.  The landscape is bleak and beautiful, shrouded in blues and greys.  If the film had better acting and no dialogue, it would actually have been a pretty good flick.

Stardust Movie Trailer

Harry Potter & the Order of the Phoenix

Klaus, the Fork Truck Driver

German fork truck training video ... maybe. [Warning: this is disturbing and not for the faint of heart.]

Superman II: The Richard Donner Cut (2006)

Superman II - The Richard Donner Cut was released last year by Warner Bros. to coincide with the release of the new Superman movie. This cut is a re-edit of the original 1980 movie by the movie's original director, Richard Donner, who had a different vision of the movie than the producers. I don't remember the original that well, although I do remember it being more campy than this release, which is more serious in its treatment of the Superman character. For details, check out this extensive entry in Wikipedia.

Christopher Reeve's Superman was the film Superman I grew up with, and is a Superman I'm glad was replaced last year. I'm not a Superman purist, and most of those would probably prefer Reeve's incarnation. Don't get me wrong, I like the films, but after seeing it recently, I realized that, 1) I saw the films as a kid, and, 2) special effects sure have come a long way, thankfully. Special effects are an artifact of their time, but the interpretation of the Superman character isn't. What I couldn't get over this time around was the painfully awkward Clark Kent. Did Superman's alter ego really need to be such a stereotypical nerd? That being said, there was much more of Kal-El in the movie than there was of Superman. This cut did allow for introspection, instead of being superficial, as the original had been. I had also forgotten how large glasses were in the 1980s. (Most of my 1980s photographs have long been hidden.)

If you haven't seen a Christopher Reeve's Superman flick in sometime, I recommend watching this latest cut. It'll take you back.

Sheitan (2006)

When a group of friends exit a dance party after a drunken fight and are invited to spend the night in the country, you know the ride is not going to be what they expected. Sheitan is a French horror flick from Tartan Films that delivers a confusing and perverted mess. The four friends are seduced to the country by Eve (Roxanne Mesquida). Thai (Nicholas Le Phat Tan) and Bart (Olivier Bartélémy) want to go because they're both vying for Eve's attentions. Ladj (Ladj Ly) is going because he's hoping to hook-up with Yasmine (Leïla Bekhti). Their expectations will hardly be met at the farmhouse in the French countryside.

The weirdness starts on the dirt road to the farmhouse. Blocked on the road by goats, the group meets Joseph (Vincent Cassel), who is introduced by Eve as the housekeeper. Joseph is an over-the-top character. Couple of things you're sure of are: he is completely mad, and he has an unhealthy interest in Bart. You realize very quickly that Eve has led the foursome into a trap that some may not leave alive. Joseph's wife, Marie, who you don't see much of, is pregnant. Mary, Joseph and Eve aren't the only references to Christian mythology -- this is all taking place on Christmas eve -- but you're not given the entire story to make sense of their use. Joseph is definitely in league with the Devil, but other than the goat and a dream sequence, you're told exactly what's going on. Joseph makes dolls -- lots of them. As you're taken around the house, you're not entirely sure if some of those dolls weren't made from pieces of previous guests to the house, as Joseph's latest creation seems to require Bart for its completion. The Devil wants a child in payment for making Joseph invincible, but what does making dolls and using Bart for their creation has anything to do with this?

The movie is pure insanity. There are a number of minor characters to take the weirdness up a few notches. But it's also confusing. I'm not sure if there was something lost in the translation, but this didn't quite go down right with me. The reasons to watch this film: the performance of Vincent Cassel -- the man is nuts; and, you like freaky horror movies from the 1970s, because this is just like them.

Blue Fin (1978)

Black Scorpion II: Aftershock (1997) movie trailer

Darcy is back on the force, but still fights on as the Black Scorpion because "it's in her nature." This time, she fights Gangster Prankster; and a new villian emerges when the Mayor tries to protect his federal earthquake relief money: Aftershock. When the two villians team up and kidnap Argyle's girlfriend, Black Scorpion is faced with the theft of the Scorpionmobile and the imminent destruction of Angel City.

Best of the Best (1989)

A team from the United States are going to compete in the world finals in karate. The team consists of fighters from all nations, can they overcome their rivalry and work together to win?

300 Trailer

Based on the epic graphic novel by Frank Miller, 300 is a ferocious retelling of the ancient Battle of Thermopylae in which King Leonidas (Gerard Butler) and 300 Spartans fought to the death against Xerxes and his massive Persian army. Facing insurmountable odds, their valor and sacrifice inspire all of Greece to unite against their Persian enemy, drawing a line in the sand for democracy. The film brings Miller's (Sin City) acclaimed graphic novel to life by combining live action with virtual backgrounds that capture his distinct vision of this ancient historic tale.

Updated: March 19, 2007
Saw the movie ... here are my thoughts ...

I saw Frank Miller's 300 last week. What a ride! The movie is based on the graphic novel by the same title, and was a no apologies live action rendition of the panels created by Frank Miller and Lynn Varley. The acting was superb, the story was a well crafted and the cinematography, simply out of this world. Greece from the movie was a Greece of the legends, when the gods walked amongst us mere humans. Make no mistake, this movie is not the stuff of the History Channel -- it's for the SciFi Channel.

The movie was rated 18A, and so it should. The violence -- and when isn't there violence when you have 300, well-buffed, mostly naked (except of the leotards and capes) men shouting, sweating and wielding long spears, arranged against a well armed, uncountable throng -- was unstoppable. Hordes of attackers from the Persian empire threw themselves at the spears, swords and grunts of the Spartan heroes. There were monsters, immortals (who died), giants, mutants and 7-8-9-ft. Persian king-god -- but none were out of reach of the Spartans. Lest you think the movie was just chock full of violence -- it was actually -- there was also politicking intrigue, with spineless schemers, selling their own freedom for gold. The Battle of Thermopylae never looked better!

Of course, they all die. As they must when you go to see a Frank Miller inspired movie. If you've seen Sin City - Unrated (Two-Disc Collector's Edition), you know what a treat you're in for. A visually stunning film, made to appreciated for what it is. Naturally, the critics have all panned the film. Which is a good thing. This film isn't for critics.

Pathfinder Trailer

A young Viking boy is left behind by his people in North America (which the Vikings had visited hundreds of years before Columbus). A stranger in a strange land, the boy is raised by a tribe of American Indians -- the very people the Vikings had sworn to destroy.

When Vikings again storm the eastern shores, waging a barbaric campaign, they slaughter the tribe that adopted the young man. Now 25, he wages a violent personal war to stop the Viking's trail of death and destruction.

The Invisible Trailer

When a teenager is attacked and left for dead, he finds himself in limbo, invisible to the living, and racing against time to find his body before he truly perishes. The only living person who might be able to save him is his attacker, a troubled girl who is on the run from the law.

The Reaping Trailer

A Christian missionary (Hilary Swank) who lost her faith after her family was tragically killed has since become a world renowned expert in disproving religious phenomena. But when she investigates a small Louisiana town that is suffering from what appear to be the Biblical plagues, she realizes that science cannot explain what is happening and she must regain her faith to combat the dark forces threatening the community.

Grind House Teaser Trailers

Two 60-minute horror movies, "Planet Terror" (written/directed by Robert Rodriguez) which explores an alien world eerily familiar to ours; and "Death Proof" (written/directed by Quentin Tarantino), a rip-roaring slasher flick where the killer pursues his victims with a car rather than a knife.

Stephen King's 1408 Trailer

The Host Trailer

Gang-du (Song Kang-ho) works at a food stand on the banks of the Han River. Dozing on the job, he is awakened by his daughter, Hyun-seo (Ko A-sung), who is angry with him for missing a teacher-parent meeting at school.

As Gang-du walks out to the riverbank with a delivery, he notices that a large crowd of people has gathered, taking pictures and talking about something hanging from the Han River Bridge. The otherwise idyllic landscape turns suddenly to bedlam when a terrifying creature climbs up onto the riverbank and begins to crush and eat people.

Gang-du and his daughter run for their lives but suddenly the thing grabs Hyun-seo and disappears back into the river. The government announces that the thing apparently is the Host of an unidentified virus. Having feared the worst, Gang-du receives a phone call from his daughter who is frightened, but very much alive. Gang-du makes plans to infiltrate the forbidden zone near the Han River to rescue his daughter from the clutches of the horrifying Host...

Sharkwater Trailer

For filmmaker Rob Stewart, exploring sharks began as an underwater adventure. What it turned into was a beautiful and dangerous life journey into the balance of life on earth.

Driven by passion fed from a lifelong fascination with sharks, Stewart debunks historical stereotypes and media depictions of sharks as bloodthirsty, man-eating monsters and reveals the reality of sharks as pillars in the evolution of the seas.

Filmed in visually stunning, high definition video, Sharkwater takes you into the most shark rich waters of the world, exposing the exploitation and corruption surrounding the world's shark populations in the marine reserves of Cocos Island, Costa Rica and the Galapagos Islands, Ecuador.

In an effort to protect sharks, Stewart teams up with renegade conservationist Paul Watson of the Sea Shepherd Conservation Society. Their unbelievable adventure together starts with a battle between the Sea Shepherd and shark poachers in Guatemala, resulting in pirate boat rammings, gunboat chases, mafia espionage, corrupt court systems and attempted murder charges, forcing them to flee for their lives.

Through it all, Stewart discovers these magnificent creatures have gone from predator to prey, and how despite surviving the earth's history of mass extinctions, they could easily be wiped out within a few years due to human greed.

Stewart's remarkable journey of courage and determination changes from a mission to save the world's sharks, into a fight for his life, and that of humankind.

The Last Mimzy Trailer

Two children discover a mysterious box containing some strange devices they think are toys. As the children play with these "toys," they begin to display higher intelligence levels, prompting their parents and the community to search for answers.

The Hills Have Eyes 2 Trailer

A group of young National Guard cadets deliver equipment to a desert outpost, but find it mysteriously deserted. A distress call on their walkie-talkies leads them to believe that there are people in the hills who need to be rescued, but the call was sent by a tribe of mutants, damaged by nuclear testing, who lie in wait for them.

Dead Silence Movie Trailer

There is an old ghost story in the sleepy town of Ravens Fair about Mary Shaw, a ventriloquist who went mad. Accused of the murder of a young boy, she was hunted down by vengeful townspeople who cut out her tongue and killed her. They buried her along with her "children," a hand-made collection of vaudeville dolls.

Since that time, Ravens Fair has been plagued by death. The ghastly dolls from Mary Shaw's collection have gone missing from the grave and reappeared over the decades. In the dead of night--wherever they are glimpsed--families are found gruesomely murdered...with their tongues torn out.

Far from the pall of their hometown, newlyweds Jamie (Ryan Kwanten) and Lisa Ashen thought they had established a fresh start. But when his wife is grotesquely killed, Jamie reluctantly returns to Ravens Fair for the funeral, intent on unraveling the mystery of her death.

Once reunited with his ill father (Bob Gunton) and his father's new young bride (Amber Valletta), Jamie must dig into the town's bloody past to find out who killed his wife and why. As he uncovers the legend of Mary Shaw, Jamie unlocks the story of her curse and the truth behind the song from his childhood: if you see her and scream, you will never speak again.

Sunshine Movie Trailer

The Sun is dying, and mankind is dying with it. Our last hope: a spaceship and a crew of eight men and women. They carry a device which will breathe new life into the star. But deep into their voyage, out of radio contact with Earth, their mission is starting to unravel. Soon the crew are fighting not only for their lives, but their sanity.

Indigènes / Days of Glory (2006)

Indigènes -- a French term used for the African soldiers during the second world war, meaning "natives" -- is a more appropriate title for this movie, than the English release title, Days of Glory. There was little glorious about the participation of North African soldiers in the French army of WWII. Although the North Africans fought for the French motherland, France was hardly open arms for the Africans -- if anything, to this day, those soldiers that are still alive continue to be marginalized and not treated with the same respect of their French counterparts. The movie is about France's shame -- a shame that some are willing to acknowledge, but others, like those of the National Front, dismiss as lies.

Indigènes follows a group of Algerians who join the French army as they fight through Italy and Provence to liberate France from the Nazis -- focusing on four, each having their own reasons for fighting in defense of their colonizer. Abdelkader believes in the French ideals of liberté, égalité, and fraternité; Yassir is there just to get rich, liberating treasures wherever they're found; Saïd wants to escape poverty at home -- and Messaoud is looking to find a new life and love in France. Along the way, they are tested and transformed by the war and the bigotry they encounter.

The individual stories are powerful and superbly performed. The injustices are painful to watch. This is history, but also a potent mirror on the state of the world. The injustices continue today. The hope of the characters crushed with their fallen bodies; with history that continues to repeat itself; with bigotry that remains unchanged. The movie is powerful and moving, and hopefully will be seen by more than just the converted. This is a war movie of two wars -- with one that continues to be fought today, in desperate need of more infantry. Liberté, égalité, and fraternité: it shouldn't be so hard to accomplish.

Days of Glory (2006)

The story

1944-1945... Liberation of Italy, Provence, the Alps, the Rhone Valley, Vosges, Alsace was essential to the victory of the allies... and to establish France’s presence among them after the armistice. This victorious battle to advance on Germany, after much bloodshed and great losses, was the accomplishment of the First French Army, recruited in Africa in order to avoid the control of the German commissioners and the Vichy authorities: 200,000 men, including 130,000 “indigenes” (natives) including 110,000 North Africans, and 20,000 AfricansÉThe rest made up of two thirds “pieds- noirs” (French colonials) and one third young frenchmen who fled the occupation. The film relates the forgotten story of the soldiers known as “Indigènes” following the epics of four of them: Abdelkader, Saïd, Messaoud and Yassir (le goumier) a mobile corps, reputed for their endurance, ground sense , and courage in close combat. They are sent to the front line.

Each one is in pursuit of a different objective throughout the passage across France which they liberate, arms in hand.

Yassir joined for the booty he expected to collect.

Messaoud was surprised by the welcome from the French. He hopes to marry and live in France, to escape the arpatheid in Algeria.

Saïd wishes to escape poverty in Morocco, and hopes to find a family in the French army.

And Abdelkader who is fighting for liberty and equality, in joining the French army he hopes for France’s recognition, and more justice towards the colonised Algerians once the war is over.

Pan's Labyrinth (2006)

Pan's Labyrinth is an amazing movie, set in Francisco Franco's Spain, at the closing of World War II. It tells the story of Ofelia, a young girl who's mother is remarried to the brutal fascist, Captain Vidal -- and is pregnant with his son. Ofelia and her mother are not loved by Vidal -- he considers Ofelia a nuisance and her mother only a vessel for his son. While waiting for his son to arrive, Vidal goes about reigning terror on the populace of small town and hunting down Republican rebels. In this horrible world, Ofelia seeks comfort, and finds it surprisingly one night, in the form of a praying mantis that morphs into a fairy. The fairy leads Ofelia to a hidden labyrinth, where she meets a faun, who tells Ofelia that she is Princess Moanna of the underworld, and he has been looking for her to return her home. To prove that she has her essence intact, the faun instructs Ofelia to complete three tasks before the next full moon.

Ofelia sets about to complete her tasks as the world around her tumbles out of control. Ofelia's mother is sick and is getting worse as the pregnancy nears term; Mercedes, the servant who cares for Vidal's household and has a bond with Ofelia, is a spy for the Republican rebels; Vidal trusts no one, and grows more malevolent -- capturing and torturing rebels, killing anyone who gets in his way. Ofelia completes her first task fairly easily by retrieving a golden key from the stomach of a giant frog that lives at the root of a dying tree. She runs into trouble in her second task however, which sends her to the lair of the Pale Man to retrieve a dagger. She is warned by the faun not to eat anything from the Pale Man's table -- but she samples grapes which wakes the Pale Man who quickly gobbles up two of the faeries. Ofelia barely escapes, but the faun, upset at the death of his faeries, declares that Ofelia will never go back to the underworld and leaves her.

Alone, Ofelia bears witness to the death of her mother and the birth of her brother. Vidal grows more nasty, and captures Mercedes and Ofelia trying to flee. Ofelia is locked up, while Mercedes is taken to be tortured. When all hope is lost to Ofelia, the faun reappears to give her a last chance, only if she promises to obey his directives. She is told to steal her baby brother and bring him to the labyrinth in order to return home. She doesn't understand the instructions, but obeys, in hopes of leaving the horror behind. At the labyrinth, Ofelia is told by the faun that innocent blood, that of her baby brother, must be spilt in order for her to return home. She is horrified, and refuses. At this the faun leaves, but Vidal catches up with Ofelia and shoots her after retrieving his son. As Ofelia dies, she is transported to the underworld. There she sees the King and Queen -- the Queen looking just like her dead mother from the world above ground. She is told that she had completed her third task well, and had made the right choice in not sacrificing her brother.

All ends well ... or does it? The movie never confirms whether Ofelia's fantasy world is real, or just a place for she escapes to in her imagination. No one other than Ofelia sees the magical creatures or objects from the underworld, that she comes into contact with. Even in her dying breath, as we see the underworld, and see the Queen, we are left to suppose that maybe it was just her imagination, as the Queen looks like Ofelia's dead mother. The movie tells a sad story, with the only hope to be found in Ofelia's fantasy world. If her fantasy world isn't real ... then the story truly is a bitter pill.

Pan's Labyrinth is a Spanish language film, originally titled El Laberinto del Fauno, that is written and directed by Guillermo del Toro -- the great director of such hits as Hellboy and El Espinazo del Diablo. (In fact, del Toro has commented that El Laberinto del Fauno may in some ways be thought of as a sequel to El Espinazo del Diablo.) The film is dark and melancholy, with the fantasy elements blended seamlessly into reality-setting of the film. While del Toro is a superb storyteller however, in this movie, as with some of his previous films, there is a lack of depth to his main characters. While Ofelia is played extremely well by an eleven-year-old Ivana Baquero, her character isn't developed as well as it could have been. Left unexplored is the little girl who could be so imaginative as to perhaps invent a fantasy world to escape to. Del Toro instead, stayed at a fairytale level with his storytelling, requiring his audience to accept the story as-is -- which is OK, but some depth would have been better. The same could be said of Mercedes and Vidal. The audience isn't given enough depth to either one -- although it's easy to not miss the depth in Vidal, as Sergi López's performance as an evil tyrant was superb.

City of Rott (2006)

City of Rott is a zombie flick like not other. It's a stylized animated movie that's sure to put a smile on a gore-hound's rotting face. I think filmmaker Frank Sudol was out to ensure that not one frame of the movie was left untouched with blood. And he accomplished that with style and humour. City of Rott doesn't take itself seriously, doesn't even attempt to explain why, or why so much blood, or give a backstory, or anything. It's simple. It's a story about a old man that is slowly losing his mind in a city that has been overrun by zombies. Aided by his Walker, he wanders the City of Rott looking for a new pair of shoes, while dodging zombies and the blood-hungry worms that live in their skulls. Along the way, many zombies will feel the wrath of the Walker. But you know how this is going to end ... it's how all zombie movies end. The old man does put up a good fight however.

Here's the spin from the back of the DVD box:

"Alone, unarmed, and losing his mind, an old man named Fred is trapped in a city overrun by legions of the living dead. Driven by parasitic worms that infest their decaying bodies, hordes of rotting zombies roam the city searching for living flesh to feast upon.

Against overwhelming odds, Fred must battle his way out of the infernal city or find himself consumed by the mindless hordes in the CITY OF ROTT. With only his trusty walker as support, and not even a decent pair of sneakers to warm his aching feet, can Fred possibly escape his diabolical nightmare?

Made for true Zombie Fans, CITY OF ROTT pulls no punches. Featuring insane amounts of zombie BLOOD AND GORE, this animated horror adventure assaults you with nonstop action where one "shot to the head" is never enough. Diabolical combat, blood-soaked thrills, extravagant gore and as funny as Hell, CITY OF ROTT will fulfill your most fiendish desires! You have been warned!"

Guardian of the Realm (2004)

What a load of poop! That's what Guardian of the Realm was. The premise of the movie had the makings of b-movie gold, but alas, the execution rusted the gold potential and make it into poop. The movie is about demons -- those denizens of hell that want to take over the world to turn it into hell. I could never understand the motivation. Wouldn't it be a whole lot better to have the world the way it is and just keep messing with humans? I suppose demons aren't that smart ... but neither are the people in this movie, and none of them apparently, had seen a horror movie.

A bunch of derelict choir boys started off this little adventure by freeing a demon that had been imprisoned by Buddhist monks centuries earlier. If these guys had seen horror movies, they would have know that the first thing the freed demon would do is kill them. Which is what happened -- more or less -- a couple of them had their bodies used as hosts for other demons. Meanwhile, the uber-demon, picks the girlfriend, Nikki (played by Lana Piryan), of one of the losers, to inhabit. In no time, Nikki manages to shed her everyday clothes and don the latest in goth-chick-demon-wear. This of course is standard fare for the genre, and is suppose to work when you have no story, no acting and just all around crap to deliver. Demon-Nikki then sets out to kill and find an innocent to sacrifice on the next full moon, so s/he could finally come to full power, rain balls of fire on humanity and remake the place with the latest decor from hell.

Set against Demon-Nikki is Josh Griffin (played by Glen Levy) and Alex Marlowe (played by Tanya Dempsey), who belong to a secret, high-tech group of bounty hunters. The dialogue between Josh and Alex will leave you squirming more than any of the horror to be found in this movie. It's totally laughable. At least Demon-Nikki tries -- but the accent that Lana Piryan has just make her lines sound like a joke as well. Josh and Alex gets help from other demon fighters and their switchboard operators that seem to have more computing resources than the CIA at their fingertips. Along the way, there are demons to be slain, detective work to be done and driving around in a cheap Ford sports car. Josh and Alex bond by admiring each others choice of weapons, in which has got to be one of the most excruciating painful scenes in a movie. The dialogue and acting was so terrible!

The movie eventually came to a dull ending, with lots of kung-fu fu moves against grimacing demons; some sword play; the emergence of the demon to full power to battle our hero, the newly blessed, Josh. Alex you find out in the finale, is an angel, and s/he does some mystical hocus pocus to transfer the angel-power to Josh. It's as bad as it sounds. This movie makes Buffy look good. I recommend it for those nights when you can't get to sleep and you want some entertainment as light up that giant stogie you've been saving for a special occasion.

15 Geek Movies to Watch Before You Die

I like this list.

The Beast (of War) (1988)

The Beast is an interesting anti-war movie. It tells the story of a small band of Mujahadeen fighters hunting a Russian tank in Afghanistan during the Russian occupation. The tank, initially part of a larger tank group, had just erupted in a small Afghanistan village, hunting Mujahadeen fighters. The result is a decimated village, with few survivors, and hardly any Mujahadeen casualties. When the village fighters return to view the aftermath, they vow revenge, and set out across the desert in pursuit of the tank -- the one in question, that strays from the others in its group.

In the tank, the commander, Daskal (played by George Dzundza), slowly descends into madness. He trusts no one, not even his crew. The tank driver, Koverchenko (played by Jason Patric), reads Daskal like a book, and knows what is coming can't be good. When Daskal turns on his crew, Koverchenko finds himself abandoned -- left for dead, chained against a rock in the desert. Here's where the story takes an interesting turn. Koverchenko is rescued by the Mujahadeen, who spare him as he pleads for nanawatay -- the Pashtunwali concept of sanctuary, given to enemies who have surrendered. Taken in by the Mujahadeen, Koverchenko joins them in the hunt, knowing that he is the only one who can kill the tank with the Mujahadeen's RPG.

Koverchenko's transformation from Russian soldier to Mujahadeen fighter happens slowly through the movie. Koverchenko is disillusioned with the war -- disillusioned with the way it's being fought, and doesn't see a whole lot of point to it. He doesn't follow orders like a good soldier, but thinks and questions, earning for himself a series of demotions from where he was in army intelligence. The audience is led to empathized with Koverchenko, and see the fruitlessness of the war from his perspective. The filmmakers also uses the clever device of having the Russians speak English in the movie -- making it easier for the audience to get to closer to the Russian characters -- but then, having the Mujahadeen speak Pashto, which isn't subtitled for the audience. The audience has to work to feel for the Mujahadeen fighters, but sympathizing with their plight is easy.

Seeing this movie now, with the recasting of the Mujahadeen fighters as Taliban terrorists is interesting. The US propaganda machine has worked hard at transforming old allies in the cold war to enemies of today. Like this movie, the world is hardly black and white, and there are hardly good guys and bad guys -- just lots of shades of grey. The movie makes you think -- about a group of people who we in the west sometimes fear, sometimes hate, sometimes want to rescue and sometimes just want to have go away. The Beast of War is largely unknown war movie -- but it shouldn't be. It has a message, and it's right -- war sucks and sometimes, makes no sense.

Koverchenko to Daskal: Sorry, sir. Not much of a war. No Stalingrad. How is it that we're the Nazis this time?

The Stuff (1985)

A couple of miners in some forsaken small town discover some white goo bubbling out of the ground. Being the experimental sort, they immediately stick their fingers in it and take it straight to their mouths for a taste. Turns out the stuff actually tastes pretty good, and once you get a taste for it, you crave more and more and more. It turns out that the stuff also does something weird with people's brains -- mind control -- making people who've taken the stuff wanting to see others do likewise so the whole world can be taken over by the stuff. In short order, the miners who discovered the stuff, make a hostile takeover of Chocolate Chip Charlie's business, hire a marketing genius to sell their wonder-goo, and partner with an unethical distributor to get the stuff out to the masses.

As America succumbs to the stuff being sold as an ice cream/yogurt alternative, it's up to our heroes who know something is wrong with the stuff to save the day. Enter Jason (Scott Bloom), the kid who refuses to eat ice cream that moves on its own; David 'Mo' Rutherford (Michael Moriarty), ex-FBI agent turn corporate saboteur; Nicole (Andrea Marcovicci), the TV commercial director that sold the stuff to Americans; Chocolate Chip Charlie (Garrett Morris), a cookie businessman with deadly hands, that saw his relatives sell out his company to the stuff; and Colonel Malcolm Grommett Spears (Paul Sorvino), a right-wing nut-job with his own army, who know the commies have been putting stuff in the water for years in order to control Americans.

The Stuff is a b-movie masterpiece. The effects, mostly white-goo purposely flowing, are OK for this sort of fare. The acting, quite memorable, especially Moriarty, Morris and Sorvino. This is a movie made for late night viewing, with loads of popcorn and friends. The movie isn't the least bit scary -- just plain fun.

Underlying this movie is a social commentary on American consumerism and food consumption habits. It wasn't a message that was delivered with a heavy-hand -- rather, it was subtle, and ran throughout the film. The message is especially relevant today, as obesity has reached epidemic proportions. I won't dwell on it in this review. If you're going to watch the movie, you may chose if you want to see the message or not.

The Plague (2006)

The Plague, otherwise known as Clive Barker's The Plague, is a movie that capitalizes on the zombie resurgence. Barker served as a producer of the movie, and that was about it. Sticking his name on it is bit of marketing spin, but it did little to help this movie make it to the theatres. The movie itself wasn't all that bad. The acting was OK for this sort of thing, and the cinematography was good. The premise was a battle of the generations, with a zombie twist to spice things up.

Ten years ago, the story goes, children around the world were infected by a plague. Doctors know nothing about it, and have never found out what it was that infected the children. The infected children, all nine years old or younger, went into a coma. Since then, they've been cared for -- some at hospitals, in large wards -- some at home, by parents who still love them and are waiting for them to wake up.

Fast forward to today, and all hell breaks loose when the children wake from their ten year slumber, in a pissed off mood. Around the world, they're out hunting everybody who were not struck by the plague. They share some collective intelligence. Each learning from what the others are experiencing. That means in no time, they've disabled all vehicles and have learned to use guns. They also seem incredibly strong and can withstand a few good blows, and sometimes bullets. Yup, zombies.

The first half of the movie moves with a slow, steady and almost uneventful pace, with characters being developed. For some reason, there's repeated references to Grapes of Wrath, but I can't figure out why. When the kids wake up however, the pace of the movie jumps in high gear. The running, the screaming, the hysterics and purposeful zombie gait of the murderous children. It's a battle of the generations, as one seeks to obliterate the other.

This would have been alright for a zombie movie, but then suddenly, out of nowhere, religion is introduced. And I don't mean the, "Oh God! Oh God! We're all going to die!" sort of religion. I mean suddenly, this isn't about a plague, this is about retribution of some sorts, with the almighty pulling the strings to push the restart button on humanity. Or so I'm guessing. The movie is not quite clear on the whole idea. The end just comes abruptly. The kids suddenly stop their killing because one guy gives himself as a sacrifice to the kids. There was something about "having no fear when the children come." Something like that anyway.

The end threw, what was shaping up to be a good zombie movie, into sheer confusion. It took the entire movie away from the zombie-crazy audience, and left them with, WTF? Some people over at IMDB [registration required] think they can explain the movie, but I don't buy the explanations. Too many holes.

The Bone Snatcher (2003)

Ah, what cheap thrills b-movie horror poop can be. The Bone Snatcher is set in some desert somewhere -- filmed in South Africa -- where a monster is accidentally awaken by some diamond prospectors. There are characters, none of them really anything special. They're typical of this fare. There is the girl. There is the nerd. There is the crazy guy who breaks all the rules, acts first and may think later. And there is the superstitious one. They're all going to die so only the nerd and the girl will live to be happy ever after. Of course, that's going to take two hours.

The monster is introduced when it's awaken in the desert and it immediately grabs one of the mine prospectors and strips him of his flesh. Another two quickly follows. Others are sent in to investigate, and in short order, finds two bodies and start hunting the third, believed to be a murderer. In no time, they find the third body, a slinking skeleton covered with a black moving mass that looks like dust. Being simple people and having guns, they shoot, shout and scream. Not in that particular order. Then they run, when the guns prove to be ineffective.

The desert is hot in the day, freezing at night. Trucks break down mysteriously. A monster hunts people. And a magic gizmo seems to beep whenever the monster gets close. The monster is eventually explained by the nerd as being ants, that are governed by a queen that rules the nest. Their original nest is disturbed, so they need bones to to create a body to move around. Don't try to make sense of it. It's silly. But it's a b-movie, what did you expect? If you're into this sort of thing, you'll have fun with it. If you're not, well ... don't bother.

TMNT (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles) Teaser Trailer

After the defeat of their old arch nemesis, The Shredder, the Turtles have grown apart as a family. Struggling to keep them together, their rat sensei, Master Splinter, becomes worried when strange things begin to brew in New York City. Tech-industrialist Max Winters is amassing an army of ancient monsters to apparently take over the world.

300 Trailer

300, release date: March 9, 2007. Based on the epic graphic novel by Frank Miller, 300 is a ferocious retelling of the ancient Battle of Thermopylae in which King Leonidas (Gerard Butler) and 300 Spartans fought to the death against Xerxes and his massive Persian army. Facing insurmountable odds, their valor and sacrifice inspire all of Greece to unite against their Persian enemy, drawing a line in the sand for democracy. The film brings Miller's (Sin City) acclaimed graphic novel to life by combining live action with virtual backgrounds that capture his distinct vision of this ancient historic tale.

Ghost Rider Trailer

Ghost Rider, release date: Feb. 16, 2007. In Columbia Pictures’ adventure thriller Ghost Rider, a superstar motorcycle stunt rider Johnny Blaze strikes a deal with the vile Mephistopheles for the most precious of commodities – his immortal soul. Now Johnny Blaze is forever destined to ride night after night as the host to the powerful supernatural entity known as the Ghost Rider.

Bridge to Terabithia

Bridge to Terabithia, release date: Feb. 17, 2007 An 11-year-old boy’s life is changed forever when he befriends the class outsider—who happens to be a girl. Together Jess (Josh Hutcherson) and Leslie (AnnaSophia Robb) create the world of Terabithia, an imaginary kingdom filled with giants and trolls and all manner of magical beings. While the real world of family and school may be filled with difficulties, in Terabithia they rule as King and Queen. When an unexpected tragedy occurs, one of them will have to pull all the strength possible from the great legacy of Terabithia. Based on the Newbery Medal-winning novel by Katherine Paterson.

The Messengers Trailer

The Messengers -- Set to be released Feb. 2, 2007. An ominous darkness invades a seemingly serene sunflower farm in North Dakota, and the Solomon family is torn apart by suspicion, mayhem and murder. Stars: Kristen Stewart, Dylan McDermott, Penelope Ann Miller, John Corbett. Directed by Oxide and Danny Pang. Produced by Sam Raimi.

ARTHUR & THE INVISIBLES Trailer

From the creative mind of talented filmmaker Luc Besson (La Femme Nikita, The Fifth Element), comes a larger-than-life, family adventure about a boy who, after his grandfather disappears, sets out to save his family home from emerging real estate developers. Arthur learns that he must follow his grandfather’s ancient clues to a vast treasure – and unlock the passageway to a spectacular new world filled with mysterious little people, so tiny they are considered invisible, and enlist their help. But once in the magical land, Arthur must join swords with a beautiful princess and a reckless army of defenders to save the land from the evil wizard. It seems like an impossible task, but as he discovers along the way, sometimes the smallest heroes can make the biggest difference. Using a dazzling new combination of live-action and ground-breaking CGI technology, ARTHUR AND THE INVISIBLES is the story about the true meaning of courage and the endless power of imagination. The film is scheduled for release on January 12, 2007, and stars Mia Farrow and Freddie Highmore, featuring the voices of Madonna, David Bowie and Snoop Dog. ARTHUR AND THE INVISIBLES was written and directed by Luc Besson and is based on the best selling children's book, “Arthur and the Minimoys.”

Pan's Labyrinth Full Trailer

Spain, 1944. The end of the Civil War. Recently remarried Carmen moves with her daughter Ofélia into the house of her new husband, coldly authoritarian Vidal, a captain in Franco’s army. Finding her new life hard to bear, the young girl seeks refuge in a mysterious labyrinth she discovers next to the sprawling family house. Pan, the guardian, a magical creature, reveals that she is none other than the long-lost princess of a magical kingdom. To discover the truth, Ofélia will have to accomplish three dangerous tasks, tasks which nothing has prepared her to face… Written and directed by Guillermo Del Toro, PAN’S LABYRINTH is released November 24th.