What a load of poop! That's what Guardian of the Realm was. The premise of the movie had the makings of b-movie gold, but alas, the execution rusted the gold potential and make it into poop. The movie is about demons -- those denizens of hell that want to take over the world to turn it into hell. I could never understand the motivation. Wouldn't it be a whole lot better to have the world the way it is and just keep messing with humans? I suppose demons aren't that smart ... but neither are the people in this movie, and none of them apparently, had seen a horror movie.
A bunch of derelict choir boys started off this little adventure by freeing a demon that had been imprisoned by Buddhist monks centuries earlier. If these guys had seen horror movies, they would have know that the first thing the freed demon would do is kill them. Which is what happened -- more or less -- a couple of them had their bodies used as hosts for other demons. Meanwhile, the uber-demon, picks the girlfriend, Nikki (played by Lana Piryan), of one of the losers, to inhabit. In no time, Nikki manages to shed her everyday clothes and don the latest in goth-chick-demon-wear. This of course is standard fare for the genre, and is suppose to work when you have no story, no acting and just all around crap to deliver. Demon-Nikki then sets out to kill and find an innocent to sacrifice on the next full moon, so s/he could finally come to full power, rain balls of fire on humanity and remake the place with the latest decor from hell.
Set against Demon-Nikki is Josh Griffin (played by Glen Levy) and Alex Marlowe (played by Tanya Dempsey), who belong to a secret, high-tech group of bounty hunters. The dialogue between Josh and Alex will leave you squirming more than any of the horror to be found in this movie. It's totally laughable. At least Demon-Nikki tries -- but the accent that Lana Piryan has just make her lines sound like a joke as well. Josh and Alex gets help from other demon fighters and their switchboard operators that seem to have more computing resources than the CIA at their fingertips. Along the way, there are demons to be slain, detective work to be done and driving around in a cheap Ford sports car. Josh and Alex bond by admiring each others choice of weapons, in which has got to be one of the most excruciating painful scenes in a movie. The dialogue and acting was so terrible!
The movie eventually came to a dull ending, with lots of kung-fu fu moves against grimacing demons; some sword play; the emergence of the demon to full power to battle our hero, the newly blessed, Josh. Alex you find out in the finale, is an angel, and s/he does some mystical hocus pocus to transfer the angel-power to Josh. It's as bad as it sounds. This movie makes Buffy look good. I recommend it for those nights when you can't get to sleep and you want some entertainment as light up that giant stogie you've been saving for a special occasion.
was. The premise of the movie had the makings of b-movie gold, but alas, the execution rusted the gold potential and make it into poop. The movie is about demons -- those denizens of hell that want to take over the world to turn it into hell. I could never understand the motivation. Wouldn't it be a whole lot better to have the world the way it is and just keep messing with humans? I suppose demons aren't that smart ... but neither are the people in this movie, and none of them apparently, had seen a horror movie.A bunch of derelict choir boys started off this little adventure by freeing a demon that had been imprisoned by Buddhist monks centuries earlier. If these guys had seen horror movies, they would have know that the first thing the freed demon would do is kill them. Which is what happened -- more or less -- a couple of them had their bodies used as hosts for other demons. Meanwhile, the uber-demon, picks the girlfriend, Nikki (played by Lana Piryan), of one of the losers, to inhabit. In no time, Nikki manages to shed her everyday clothes and don the latest in goth-chick-demon-wear. This of course is standard fare for the genre, and is suppose to work when you have no story, no acting and just all around crap to deliver. Demon-Nikki then sets out to kill and find an innocent to sacrifice on the next full moon, so s/he could finally come to full power, rain balls of fire on humanity and remake the place with the latest decor from hell.
Set against Demon-Nikki is Josh Griffin (played by Glen Levy) and Alex Marlowe (played by Tanya Dempsey), who belong to a secret, high-tech group of bounty hunters. The dialogue between Josh and Alex will leave you squirming more than any of the horror to be found in this movie. It's totally laughable. At least Demon-Nikki tries -- but the accent that Lana Piryan has just make her lines sound like a joke as well. Josh and Alex gets help from other demon fighters and their switchboard operators that seem to have more computing resources than the CIA at their fingertips. Along the way, there are demons to be slain, detective work to be done and driving around in a cheap Ford sports car. Josh and Alex bond by admiring each others choice of weapons, in which has got to be one of the most excruciating painful scenes in a movie. The dialogue and acting was so terrible!
The movie eventually came to a dull ending, with lots of kung-fu fu moves against grimacing demons; some sword play; the emergence of the demon to full power to battle our hero, the newly blessed, Josh. Alex you find out in the finale, is an angel, and s/he does some mystical hocus pocus to transfer the angel-power to Josh. It's as bad as it sounds. This movie makes Buffy look good. I recommend it for those nights when you can't get to sleep and you want some entertainment as light up that giant stogie you've been saving for a special occasion.
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